Here is a string of posts that had me glued to my computer. And, don’t worry, singlets, though both blogs are marriage-related, I think the core of the “argument” can be applied to so much more.
The Post That Started It:
A Good Marriage is the Enemy of a Great Marriage @ SimpleMarriage
The Rebuttal Rant:
A Manifest for “Pretty OK” @ Project M
In the spirit of true bloggy harmony, Kathleen and Corey agreed to exchange guest posts on each others’ blogs.
He Said (On Her Blog):
A Manifesto for “Pretty OK Sucks”
She Said (On His Blog):
In Defense of Pretty OK
Both bloggers present very persuasive arguments. Did you find yourself agreeing more with one than the other? I’d love to know your thoughts.
Totally going with the guy. I think marriage is one place it is just to dangerous to be lazy. In watching those around me it just doesn’t take to long for a marriage to start going in a bad direction.
I am not saying I am awesome at it, but we work hard at our marriage. It is just too precious to settle for OK. I want a rock star marriage and am gonna try and get there.
Again, in this “just had a baby” phase of life, I’m not really rockin’ it, but these posts really excited me. Thanks for the links!!
interesting. i am going to have to go with kathleen.
So glad you chimed in! I keep going back and reading these posts over and over again. I am totally someone who wants to be the best at everything, but I’m not very competitve. So, if I see that I’m not going to “knock it out of the park”, then I just flat out give up. (I do realize this is not my best character trait!) I do think this is dangerous in a marriage, or at least it’s dangerous in MY marriage. However, I am so OVER our culture’s current push to excel at everything we do. I don’t want my kids to feel like a failure if they are not the best at something. I do want them to work hard and try their best, but they are not going to be the best at everything. And when they do come up somewhere in the middle, I want “just ok” to be ok with them. I realize that the posts are addressing marriage specifically, but I just couldn’t keep from thinking about how it applied to everything.
Thanks for linking to our posts, Brandi, and offering some additional thoughts!
I have to say that not even I am completed convinced by my own argument. I totally see Corey’s side, too. I don’t want to get lazy and settle for mediocre when I could achieve more. But I also don’t think it’s right to kick ourselves constantly for being less than awesome. It’s a tough balance, and people tend to lean either to the lazy side or the stressed-out, guilt-driven, hyperactive side. My personal struggle is with the latter.
And you’re not the only one who couldn’t keep from thinking about how it applied to life outside of marriage. I was constantly thinking in terms of all areas of life, too. Marriage is just one of the things we’re expected to excel at.
Thanks again!